“How many people in this room have a conflict in their lives?”
We ask this question as part of our 30 second elevator speech describing who we are, what we do and what our approach to conflict is here at HSCT, every time we stand up at a networking event.
From rooms as small as four people to rooms with as many as one hundred people, no one yet has raised their hands.
We’ll keep asking, but, we recall that, even back into Biblical times, conflict existed.
James, Jesus’ brother pointed out in his gospel (4:1-3) that wars and fightings occur among people because of the desires (in the original King James version, the word used is “lusts”) that do battle inside of us.
And yet, no one ever raises their hand.
- Poor—or no—communication leads to conflict.
- Differences in priorities, values, goals, talents and opinions lead to conflict.
- Competition over perceived limited resources leads to conflict.
- And,of course, knowing what to do, and doing the opposite, leads to conflict. In the Bible, this is called “sin.”
Sometimes the worst types of conflicts, such as—well—wars and fightings, come about because of sinful actions, desires and behaviors.
So why are so many people unwilling to answer the question we pose honestly?
Well, it’s hard to admit that conflict exists, particularly if the person admitting to it doesn’t perceive there to be a conflict.
It’s also hard if the other party refuses to acknowledge that there is even a problem in the first place.
Finally, admitting to having a conflict requires us to be vulnerable, and there is no place we’d rather not be vulnerable, than in front of our peers at a networking event.
So, we’ll ask at the end of this blog post:
“How many people in this room have a conflict in their lives?”
[Thanks to Ken Sande. Check out his book here.]
-Peace Be With You All-
Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: hsconsultingandtraining@gmail.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/
HSCT’s website: http://www.hsconsultingandtraining.com
