Residents of (YOUR TOWN NAME HERE) Save $100 A DAY by Doing This One Simple Trick!!!!

Click bait articles and headline jacking efforts are just the latest in a long line of American hucksterism that began with Western, one man traveling wagon shows and continued through to TV infomercials from Billy Mays for OxiClean.

The first inherent problem with of all these forms of advertisement is the combination of shameless flim-flamism, the deceit of the short con, and the promise of a good deal of vaudeville.

The inherent false promise in this tradition plays on the long-standing, human desire for just one easy step that solves a difficult problem, fulfills an unmet need, or at the very minimum, entertains the viewer outrageously.

The reason why concerns about the lack of regulation in election advertising fall on deaf ears every two to four years is that the majority of election advertising is targeted at about the same level of click bait, online advertising and blog posts.

Add to all of it, candidates approving messages that, if your kid, your partner or your friend said them, you’d tell them they were full of it.

And we all know what “it” is.

“It seems so simple. It should be easy.”

This statement came out of a workshop I did recently as well as a podcast interview I gave recently.

Well, if the Truth were simple and easy, hucksters, flim-flam men, election year advertising, and other forms of selling that create artificial conflicts, fake disruptions, and incoherent disconnections, wouldn’t be so popular to use as shortcuts to the capital “T” truth.

And clickbait articles would drive almost no traffic on social media and in new journalism.

Do you feel like you saved $100 yet today?

-Peace Be With You All-

Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: hsconsultingandtraining@gmail.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/

Actively Listening Past TL;DR

Relationships between humans become complicated in face-to-face communication when there is little use of emotional intelligence, little cognitive understanding of what is going on in a conversation and little ability to engage positively in conflict with another person.

So, in the digital space, tl;dr (too long; didn’t read) becomes a shorthand way of not listening to arguments we’d rather not hear.

Avoiding bad news and curating a social media feed becomes a way of limiting information that we feel is unpleasant and likely to lead to internal conflicts—or external ones.

And emotional intelligence goes out the window with flame wars, spam commentary and useless “noise.”

So, what’s the average person to do to combat all of this?

The way to actively listen online is too do the things that aren’t sexy:

Read the long, laboriously written article that lays out an argument that you can’t follow.
Watch a YouTube video—or better yet a TED Talk—covering an area where you have no knowledge.
Develop a sense of that which is “noise” and that which is “valuable” rather than throwing up your hands in the air and resorting to the old trope of “what’s the world coming too.”

Do these things successfully and you will find that actively listening through the digital noise is the same skill set that you have to engage with to actively listen through the face-to-face noise.

-Peace Be With You All-

[Advice] Making Yourself Livable With Others

If you are dedicated to building your entrepreneurial business, it’s going to be tough for someone to live with you.

There are two ways to deal with this:

You can hope that your idea is so good, that it stands out above the other 95% of ideas out there in your niche/target market and that customers, clients and vendors in that very narrow space, will beat a path to your door. Then, you will become the darling of Silicon Valley (or whatever valley you find yourself in) and you partner—in life or in business—will just come along for the ride, relieved that it only took 3 years for you and your idea to make the cover of Fast Company or Inc.

Or…

You can take a long, hard look at your idea and determine that the only thing that separates you from everybody else is—well—you, and then talk to your partner—first the life one—and explain to him or her, exactly how all of this is going to play out.

Explain the long nights, the depressive moods, the brushes with financial, emotional and spiritual failure.

Explain the loss of courage and the regaining of it.

Explain that all of this might not work—as a matter of a fact, in the first year there is a good shot it won’t work–and you’ll have to go back to your 9-to-5 to pay back that massive home equity loan you foolishly took out to fund your dream.

Neither way is good, but the most clear eyed, entrepreneurial consultant, knows that she has to have the courage to have this first, most important, sales conversation with her significant partner, before she can have another…and another…and another…

In the meantime, she should get a hobby that is as far away from what she is doing as possible so that she has something else to talk about, other than either being on the cover of Fast Company or her latest near miss.

-Peace Be With You All-

On Our Former Greatness

From Detroit, Michigan to Gary, Indiana, urban decay is a fact as cities evolve from the physical industrial totems to 20^th century progress into the semi-transparent, high technology incubators of the virtual 21^st century.

And, with 70% of the human population living in cities by 2050, the crimes, poverty, squatting and homelessness that occur in the midst of inevitable urban decay, will make the distinction between the virtual and the physical more and more stark.

The often highlighted conflicts between residents in the cities and those in rural areas will become more acute as well, but they will not be the most serious.

With all of the in-migration occurring, urban decay becomes a consequence of conflict between a vision of the past and the possibility of the future.

Environmental degradation, fossil fuel use, convenience to services, access to information and job security will all become the battlegrounds in the war between the physical and the virtual.

And when more and more people need fewer and fewer physical places to produce the same amount of goods and services that they did 70 years ago, what will become of the totems to humanity’s former industrial greatness.

Oh, by the way, since the poor—those in spirit, those in material wealth and those in talent—will be with us always, the discarded remnants of the current and future world’s former glory—physical and digital—will also increasingly become places to carve out their own form of prosperity, security and culture.

-Peace Be With You All-

Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: hsconsultingandtraining@gmail.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/

Gimme An “E”

There are two mindsets and one, which was chiefly dominant throughout the 20^th century is in decline, while the other is ascending.

The Entrepreneur mindset is based on taking on risk, pushing the boundaries and restlessly finding new visions and new horizons.

The Employee mindset is based on committing wholeheartedly to a project, getting paid, and then going off to do a hobby, have a family or use the money to leverage another interest.

The Entrepreneur mindset focuses on what could possibly be and the Employee mindset is focused on what is.

The Entrepreneur mindset is best exemplified through the myths of the Old West. The Employee mindset is as well.

Which mindset will “win” the future?

Neither. And that’s a good thing, because both require each other.

The Entrepreneur mindset requires some infrastructure to be built by those with an Employee mindset. The Employee mindset benefits from the “newness” and adventure in which the Entrepreneur mindset bastes.

-Peace Be With You All-

Jesan Sorrells, MA
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: hsconsultingandtraining@gmail.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/

[Advice] Talking to the People Who Don’t Matter

The people who never believed in you.
The people who said “that’ll never work.”
The people who mutter under their breath at family dinners or cocktail parties.
The people who write ridiculous, inflammatory comments on your blog.

These are just a sample of the people who don’t matter.

Why, if you’re building a consulting or coaching business, are you still trying to convince them of the rightness of your pursuit, the importance of your ideas or the validity of your life?

The people who fall into these categories (and there are many more) have never mattered to the success or failure of this project you are on.

And, fortunately, they never will.

-Peace Be With You All-

The Shifting Social Contract

Privacy, the law and the social contract is breaking down.

People want to access the internet and be social privately, secretly and anonymously, but the NSA reads our emails and may soon have access to the data that all the devices in our home will be sharing with each other.

The Lockian social contract is breaking down with technology that Locke could never have anticipated, in an effort to create a Rousseauian-libertine future with no responsibility for what we say and do.

And that’s at a macro level.

Then there is bullying and social break down in social media. Children push each other to suicide. People are redefining the workplace and griping about it on social media. People are making individual economic choices at a rational (and emotional) level to pick streaming over subscription packages.

And that’s at the micro level

So…what does all of this have to do with mediators and conflict?

At the intersection of macro and micro concerns regarding privacy, trust, secrecy, confidentiality and the breakdown of the general social contract, lies a place for peacemakers with skills and talents to train, advise, coach and mentor those for whom active listening, empathy and civil liberties seem to be quaint holdovers from an era of powdered wigs and wine snobs.

-Peace Be With You All-

Culture of Busyness

The culture of the workplace promotes a culture of appearing to be busy.

In the daily fog of war of conflict, we appear to be busy in the workplace in order to avoid having to confront the hard things:

The workplace project that isn’t working.
The relationship with the partner or co-worker that’s dysfunctional.
The organization that supports and encourages a culture of conflict as if it’s a gift rather than a curse.

The culture of busyness then pervades our family life, our community life, our social life and we wonder why the results of our busyness seem to produce more smoke that fire.

There are a lot of smoke producers in the workplace.

-Peace Be With You All-

Jesan Sorrells
Principal Conflict Engagement Consultant
Human Services Consulting and Training (HSCT)
Email HSCT: hsconsultingandtraining@gmail.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/HSConsultingandTraining
Twitter: www.twitter.com/Sorrells79
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jesansorrells/

[Advice] Talking to Your Partner

The professional consultant and coach most often acts as a solopreneur.

She is most often alone in the pursuit of dream.

She is typically overwhelmed by concerns about accounting and how much she must charge to make a profit, how her marketing is working (or not) and multiple other competing priorities.

She is alone in her business and her business practice, but she is not alone in her overall life.

She has a partner and/or friends. No woman is an island. She’s driven, but she has to make two decisions early:

How to pick a partner or friend

How much to tell that person about her solopreneurship.

The best practice is to be as honest as possible with intimate partners (and business partners are about as intimate as possible without taking off your clothes) and tell the other party, just how long it’s going to take to scale.

One less conversation to be had can make her life easier and less complicated.

-Peace Be With You All-

Cultural Negotiating

The most important driver for success in the 21st century, as the workplace shifts from being about making things with our hands, to making things with our ideas, is emotional intelligence.

Don’t get us wrong, building physical objects still means something, but the most important building is happening with ideas, a keyboard, and publishing platforms, rather than using hammers, adhering some nails and getting rough hands.

After all, I hear that these days, even a known author can’t get a book deal without an already built-in audience.

With that being noted, cultural competence—alongside emotional intelligence—becomes another tool in the box labeled “FOR IDEA BUILDING.”

Being aware of the personal, political and social cultural backgrounds and ideas of partners on a project (combined with cognitive emotional intelligence) can make navigating differences easier.

In a global world, where the lingua franca is English and everyone can see what you Tweet, post, message or blog, cultural competence (not necessarily sensitivity) becomes even more critical to getting everybody on board.

The hard work now is not only uniting the twelve team members at your table, but also uniting the distributed teams working across the globe–and doing it with a semblance of understanding.

-Peace Be With You All-